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Saturday, December 31, 2016


If I had to describe 2016 year in one word, I would choose "tears" or perhaps "death".I remember the time when we contacted for a brief time. I realise now I am a different person. I have changed a lot. Believe me, my feelings towards you are the same but the way I express it is different. If only I could put them in words and actions just like I did before. You,you are still the same. How sweet are you. How I miss you. I am sorry for every single thing I did. I never meant to hurt you :(. I am changing to suit myself into a different world. Just now I saw a girl. Exactly like you!The way she acted, dressed and talked. She reminded me of you. I had the thought that would be us if we were together but sorry I have to leave you for awhile. I am not sure you will accept me once I am completed or the worst is I am not sure I would accept you into my life later. For sure things would be different. The human part of the old me has died and it will die for two more times. I am chasing for those deaths. Maybe, just maybe if you have the chance to read this, remember, I am the old me. Maybe I have changed but my feelings are the same. It is very hard to put them into words. I cannot promise you anything anymore because I am not sure about the future. I just follow the orders given by the person whom I love the most. I must follow for my own safety and at the same time I miss you. ;(. Can you wait for me to return?