Some random thoughts

Hey remember the time when I was so full of anticipations and dreams about this life?Well I don't.Lol.Okay I lied.I do remember.Still parts of my dreams,I am carrying them.I have discarded some.If only you see the way I see, you definitely will understand.It is quite hard to find someone who will understand my point of view.I am trying to find the perfect match for myself which I see it is hard.Not many people want to give up this world before it is too late.Glory and gospel.Both of these things have destroyed people for generations yet so many people are still chasing them.They live their lives as if they will not die.Try take a moment,think what happened to people before you.The great people or perhaps the great rulers.They died.I do not want to die without enough preparation.Yes I am still young but I always think about death unless I am drifted away from the truth sometimes.My death definitely will come,I should die before my eternal death.It means I should take what I need, not what I want.People have endless desires.If you give them a mountain of gold,they will ask for the second mountain.They will chase for the second mountain and without they realise they are dead.No preparation at all.Very few people feel enough and grateful about what they have.I found a person who can always remind me about it.The problem is he is far away.My plan is, I want to move out from my current state and move in to a place nearer to him.I have to love it more than everything.Once I have moved in, I am going beneath the radar.I am going now.See you later.Good bye

Almost holiday

Good morning!!!Well lately I am moving on to my new life. It is a now what moment since I am in the semester break. So much free time even though I am working.Don't get me wrong. It means my brain has so much free time. I constantly need challenge for my brain to keep me sharp. Well when I have nothing else to think, I start to have projects. You know because I have money and I am a grown up man now. I am thinking of going fish the moment I arrive my village. I am going to buy 3 fish traps and set them for a night. I remember when I was a young boy, I set up several fish traps. At night I could not sleep because I started to imagine things. I was so excited and wished the night faded away quickly. I think the same thing will happen even I am a big man now. I just cannot contain myself for that kind of excitement. Things that make people excited rarely make me feel excited but for this thing, although it is considered minor for other people but for me it excites me. Oh by the way, a person I just barely knew has started to give me advice regarding life. I do not really enjoy it since I have my point of view of life. It is heavily influenced by someone who is highly respected by me. It may seem I am a care free person for some people. It happens because I put priority different from them. What is the point of chasing something temporary? Oh by the way, I bought a new watch. So cheap but I needed a watch so I bought it. Hey, I am off to bed now. See you later. Good night...

It is getting harder

I think I will walk alone in this life.Ya I know in 200 there will be 1 who will conform with my way of life.It is a fact.But I do not have time to try out 200.Living with me meaning there is no gospel and glory.It is hard for people to live without them.Recently questions keep on taunting my mind. What my great great great great great grandfathers and grandmothers did at this particular moment?Did they regret with their lives?Let say I am married and I have decedents. Will my great great great great great grandchildren even know my name?I don't think they even know about my existence.That is why I want to abandon gospel and glory.This world is just a place full of lies and fake promises.If only you see the way I see.The further I go,the harder I find the one.I start to see differently.Do you know deep inside,I have a constant duel.It fights each other and usually the bad one wins.I am so weak.That is why I have the highest respect for people who have won the duel.There are very few of them.I am trying to be the few.Until my dying day,I will keep on trying. ;)

Sentimental strikes

Good morning my grandchildren.It is 4:02 in the morning!!!Haha.I haven't slept yet even though I am working tomorrow.Tomorrow I do not think I am going to work because I have problem with my car. Need to fix it.I read the past posts in this blog and I can see that my style of writing is actually getting better but things which are important for me during those days are still matter to me up until today.Oh boy,how time flies.I started to write this blog in 2010 and now it is 2015.5 years...And I think I am still the same.In the 5 years,people came and went away from me.I lost several loved ones.I learnt more than before.I committed so many mistakes.There are things which are best to be kept secret and I regret them.Come to think that,people around me are getting older.I am getting older but the signs of your presence are still far. I am not sure whether my dream will come true.I rarely take my time to reflect my life but once I do it,I will feel so down for a long time. I am sorry to let people who had faith in me down. I was stupid and I was wrong. Next time before I will do something,I will start to think very deep.Will I feel regret about this here and after?

Post statistics

Hello my grandchildren!!!I just finished one more paper today.Research statistics!I kind of love and hate that paper at the same time.My hands hurt so much until now.Suddenly I realize the paper is not that hard if I studied earlier.I think I just nailed the paper. I do not really enjoy aiming just to pass any paper.I want to ace it because I feel like it is a waste of time to study when my aim is just to pass the paper. I will always do my best for every subject I take,always desire to ace every subject but if I am destined to get low mark,I have no sorrow.I am yours and everything is yours.Who am I to question you?So this coming Tuesday is my last paper for this semester.I feel like celebrating it after finishing my final paper because this semester is very rough for me. Hmmm...What should I do to celebrate the end of this semester?Should I watch movie?Nah...I hate watching movies because movies always defy logic and physics law.Should I eat at expensive restaurant?Nope...expensive restaurant menu does not really suit my appetite.I know!!!I should sleep more.I need to rest a lot after several restless nights I have been through. Can't wait to finish my master.I want to disappear after I have completed it.At that particular moment,I am with myself.Okay...See you again...Good bye

The semester

Hello my grandchildren. How are you today?Fine?I have a lot of assignments to be completed.The time is so limited. :( . This semester is the toughest semester I ever had. I am not sighing, I am stating the fact to let you know. Never ever sighed! And be patient. Everything will be okay gradually and if everything is not going to be okay, who cares? Sighing and impatient will not solve a thing.They just signs showing you are giving up. Giving up is forbidden. Sometimes when I am down, I'll find my strength by seeing the right people. Now I am going to complete my assignments. I have 2 assignments needed to be completed by the end of this week.I am thinking of going to the library again tomorrow since the environment there is so conducive. It has the internet but cannot be connected to games. So it is good for me. Okay.See you again when I see you. Take care.Good bye~ 

Small talk

Yeay,I am here to write.I did not plan to write today but since I am killing my time so here I am.Today I went fishing with my friend.I went out fishing to forget awhile things that I am going through.Guess what.I caught a decent size fish but the thing is I did not have my adrenaline rush.I need a dose of it to make me feel alive.I found a person who can give me adrenaline rush but after I learnt more about the person,I think I should not have my adrenaline rush with that person anymore because it is wrong.Just plain wrong.Maybe one day I will find a person who can constantly give me adrenaline rush and it is not wrong.