Evening my grandchildren...I guess I'm already dead by the time u read this...So I have to tell you things that you would not know if I'm not personally do it. Well as you can see from the title, the word "YOU" is referring to the "sport's day"...yeah...I hate sport's day.
You know why? coz I hate running in front of people, I hate to be in the field while the heat of the sun is killing me and I'm afraid I will not cooperate with the organizer...
I remember during my secondary school sport's day...I took part in the sports but halfheartedly... heh...I had several companions who had the same thoughts like me...yeay!!...One of the years I cannot forget is during the sport's day when I was in form 3 I had a fight with other student..You know, when I was in lower secondary, my height was 146 cm..OMG...so short..So several students tried to tease me coz I was short...At first I did not give any response because I was a good student..hehe...But one day,during the sport's day, one the students really got into my nerve...He called my names that I did not like...I could not tolerate any more coz of his face was like "pls punch me" face..
So I went straight to him then he gave me a grin...Then I asked him "what did u call me?"
He just zipped his mouth...His friends started to laugh coz he was afraid...So when I began to move away from them, that particular student started to tease me again..hahaha
Then I ran straight at him, I gave him a punch in his face...@_@..He felt...He woke up and started to kick and threw punch blindly...So uncomposed move...I took the opportunity to kick and bash him...hahaha...Then we played cat and mouse...We chased each other around the field..hahahaha
So how's it ended? He could not chase me after I punched him coz I ran around the tree...lol...So that particular incident is one of the reasons I hate sport's day...
But I tell you what,that student now is one of my friends already....And now I am taller than my secondary school..so I won't hesitate to be a bit cruel coz now I have power,,,hahaha
That's conclude my story for now...tata dear
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Down we go..strong I arise
Good evening!! I'm so tired right now but I want to write to you something because I don't have other people to go...Only you can be my companion..
Have you ever felt you are not appreciated? Well I have..so many times..At first it was quite hard to live on with that but after you get used to it,you won't feel anything anymore...This kind of situation is really bad if it happens when you are young because you will grow abnormally...You will carry on the personality that you have developed to encounter the feeling of not being appreciated as you deserved...When you are old,your behavior will not be the same with other peers around you..
I believe in a proverb which I created "when you feel pain too much,you won't feel anything even when you are happy"This is so true..I can easily fake my feeling pretend to be sad or happy until my friends and close people think that I really feel what I'm showing..
I tried several times to ask myself when was the last time I felt so happy..but I cannot recall it...all of them are not fully from my heart...I just be happy to ease people...You know what,I have a plan..one day I want to go as far as I could from people...so that I could be alone...I used to feel that I wanted to be alone until the right person came and found me..but that feeling has faded away...From now on,I just wanted to be alone so that no people could ever find me...
I always day dream being in a cold place,live in big house situated on the top of a hill,surrounded by hills and deep valleys,and all day long I play sad song on piano in the house...I just want to be like that..I want to play just for myself...not for anyone...
That's why I always listen to sad songs,fantasy songs, and when I'm listening to those kind of songs,I will start to imagine the place....Even when I'm nervous or tired, when I imagine that suddenly I can feel I just reborn with new spirits...When I'm down,I will keep telling my self "don't worry,one day you will go to the place." After saying that, I feel motivated...
How I wish I could go to that place...
Have you ever felt you are not appreciated? Well I have..so many times..At first it was quite hard to live on with that but after you get used to it,you won't feel anything anymore...This kind of situation is really bad if it happens when you are young because you will grow abnormally...You will carry on the personality that you have developed to encounter the feeling of not being appreciated as you deserved...When you are old,your behavior will not be the same with other peers around you..
I believe in a proverb which I created "when you feel pain too much,you won't feel anything even when you are happy"This is so true..I can easily fake my feeling pretend to be sad or happy until my friends and close people think that I really feel what I'm showing..
I tried several times to ask myself when was the last time I felt so happy..but I cannot recall it...all of them are not fully from my heart...I just be happy to ease people...You know what,I have a plan..one day I want to go as far as I could from people...so that I could be alone...I used to feel that I wanted to be alone until the right person came and found me..but that feeling has faded away...From now on,I just wanted to be alone so that no people could ever find me...
I always day dream being in a cold place,live in big house situated on the top of a hill,surrounded by hills and deep valleys,and all day long I play sad song on piano in the house...I just want to be like that..I want to play just for myself...not for anyone...
That's why I always listen to sad songs,fantasy songs, and when I'm listening to those kind of songs,I will start to imagine the place....Even when I'm nervous or tired, when I imagine that suddenly I can feel I just reborn with new spirits...When I'm down,I will keep telling my self "don't worry,one day you will go to the place." After saying that, I feel motivated...
How I wish I could go to that place...
Friday, October 1, 2010
Live forever?
Good evening my grandchildren.I've been through on such a hectic life until this moment.So many assignments and projects need to be completed.Actually I wanted to play online game but my internet is so slow.Slower than a snail.Only suitable for surfing and watching youtube..T_T..
But anyway today I'm going to tell you an event which did shake my though to the very core foundation of my life.It happened around 3 weeks ago but I still can remember it clearly.I'll cut it short and sweet just for you.3 weeks ago I went to see my great grandmother somewhere in Kedah ( I need to keep the location secret just for pure fun).I went with my grandfather.Ok..Actually my grandfather wanted to ride on motorcycle alone to the house but I felt a bit worry due to the age of my grandfather plus the distance also.I offered myself to take him to the house.I drove a car..The journey was really tiring because of the distance. Along the way,my grandfather kept mentioning his intention to eat roti canai...I stopped at several places to full fill his desire but there were no single stall selling roti canai..Then we proceeded the journey to the great grandma house.
By the time we almost there, suddenly my grandfather asked "Did you notice any mosque at the left side?The mosque indicates we are near to the house"...and I said "no"....In my heart I monologue "hmm..now you told me to look for the mosque..things would be easier if you mention it earlier..."but I could not get angry to my grandfather because of two reasons..The first one is he is my grandfather and the second one is I remember the time he waited for me almost everyday outside the school to fetch me up when I was in secondary school...but if other people do the same mistake like my grandfather did, for sure I will curse because of the action..haha...
Back to the story,we actually had passed the mosque so I did a U turn..Then we found the junction...so to cut it short, we arrived at the house..There was an old man sitting on a wheel chair greeted us..I asked my grandpa who was that and he said "that is ur great grandmother's son-in-law" huhu...so OLD!!!...
There was a sad thing happening after the old man greeted us...I noticed he couldn't talk properly!!!He had stroke...half of his body was not functioning so our communication became very difficult...My great grandmother was not at home...I asked him "where is my great grandmother?" he said something but all I could hear was "aaaa aaa aaa"=_=..I felt so bad because I could not understand not even a single word from him...But my grandfather could understand him...T_T...
My great grandmother went out shopping with her nephew...So we decided to wait for her...While waiting for her,my grandpa and the old man talked using signal language...I listened to the mp3 player but I could guess the topic with the help of signal language...suddenly the old man showed a sign by putting his both hands on his head...I was just like "?????"but my grandpa said "Yes..I did the Haj already"oOo...they were talking about the Haj...Then after my grandfather said that,the old man' eyes started to get wet...OMG..I could see tears coming from his eyes...He wept!!!He started to mumbling as if he was disappointed with himself...This time I could understand him..While there were tears running from his eyes,he tried to lift his legs and wanted to stand..He wanted to be normal so that he could go to Mecca...I was touched from what I saw..Both of them talked and talked for hours while waiting for my great grandmother coming back..Sometimes my grandpa asked me "Is it ok with you to wait until she is here?"...Frankly speaking no I'm not ok...I hate waiting..but for the sake of my grandfather, I said "yeah...I can wait for her"...I tell you,if other people ask me to wait especially for insignificance things, I won't wait!!!
After hours of waiting, finally my great grandmother came back..What a relief!!!...haha...From the first time I saw her, I couldn't resist to laugh because I was entertained by her animated actions..haha..I felt as if my waiting was very worth while....So many things I asked her...like "do you still smoke?"hahaha..yes!!MY GREAT GRANDMOTHER IS A SMOKER...When we were talking,relatives who wee staying near the house started to come...They had one thing in common..Which was all of them were old..=_=...I felt like I was trapped..haha...
Most common topic they talked was about death..OMG...That topic was not suitable for my age!!!hahaha..but from the way the talked,slowly I felt I got drifted by my young age..One of them said "Life is short...we used to be young like you..."he pointed at me..That sentence woke me up from my dream..now I realized how fast time can fly..We are getting older each second...For example I was younger when I started to write this blog compared to now...My grandfather really enjoyed the visit...I could see it from his eyes...Another thing is my grandfather said to his mother "Nowadays I am afraid to ride on motorcycle for a long journey because of my age..Luckily my grand son wanted to take me to see you"...I was like "OoO..actually you are not confident with yourself but you pretend to be other wise"If I did not offer him to take him to his mother,I dare to say he would go there even he is not fit enough"...
After awhile, we said goodbye to them...On the way back home,only God knew how tired I was but I played cool..My grandfather felt to sleep in the car...Leaved me alone driving..huuuu...
That's all for today dear..I want to sleep right now...see u soon dear..love u soo much..taaa
But anyway today I'm going to tell you an event which did shake my though to the very core foundation of my life.It happened around 3 weeks ago but I still can remember it clearly.I'll cut it short and sweet just for you.3 weeks ago I went to see my great grandmother somewhere in Kedah ( I need to keep the location secret just for pure fun).I went with my grandfather.Ok..Actually my grandfather wanted to ride on motorcycle alone to the house but I felt a bit worry due to the age of my grandfather plus the distance also.I offered myself to take him to the house.I drove a car..The journey was really tiring because of the distance. Along the way,my grandfather kept mentioning his intention to eat roti canai...I stopped at several places to full fill his desire but there were no single stall selling roti canai..Then we proceeded the journey to the great grandma house.
By the time we almost there, suddenly my grandfather asked "Did you notice any mosque at the left side?The mosque indicates we are near to the house"...and I said "no"....In my heart I monologue "hmm..now you told me to look for the mosque..things would be easier if you mention it earlier..."but I could not get angry to my grandfather because of two reasons..The first one is he is my grandfather and the second one is I remember the time he waited for me almost everyday outside the school to fetch me up when I was in secondary school...but if other people do the same mistake like my grandfather did, for sure I will curse because of the action..haha...
Back to the story,we actually had passed the mosque so I did a U turn..Then we found the junction...so to cut it short, we arrived at the house..There was an old man sitting on a wheel chair greeted us..I asked my grandpa who was that and he said "that is ur great grandmother's son-in-law" huhu...so OLD!!!...
There was a sad thing happening after the old man greeted us...I noticed he couldn't talk properly!!!He had stroke...half of his body was not functioning so our communication became very difficult...My great grandmother was not at home...I asked him "where is my great grandmother?" he said something but all I could hear was "aaaa aaa aaa"=_=..I felt so bad because I could not understand not even a single word from him...But my grandfather could understand him...T_T...
My great grandmother went out shopping with her nephew...So we decided to wait for her...While waiting for her,my grandpa and the old man talked using signal language...I listened to the mp3 player but I could guess the topic with the help of signal language...suddenly the old man showed a sign by putting his both hands on his head...I was just like "?????"but my grandpa said "Yes..I did the Haj already"oOo...they were talking about the Haj...Then after my grandfather said that,the old man' eyes started to get wet...OMG..I could see tears coming from his eyes...He wept!!!He started to mumbling as if he was disappointed with himself...This time I could understand him..While there were tears running from his eyes,he tried to lift his legs and wanted to stand..He wanted to be normal so that he could go to Mecca...I was touched from what I saw..Both of them talked and talked for hours while waiting for my great grandmother coming back..Sometimes my grandpa asked me "Is it ok with you to wait until she is here?"...Frankly speaking no I'm not ok...I hate waiting..but for the sake of my grandfather, I said "yeah...I can wait for her"...I tell you,if other people ask me to wait especially for insignificance things, I won't wait!!!
After hours of waiting, finally my great grandmother came back..What a relief!!!...haha...From the first time I saw her, I couldn't resist to laugh because I was entertained by her animated actions..haha..I felt as if my waiting was very worth while....So many things I asked her...like "do you still smoke?"hahaha..yes!!MY GREAT GRANDMOTHER IS A SMOKER...When we were talking,relatives who wee staying near the house started to come...They had one thing in common..Which was all of them were old..=_=...I felt like I was trapped..haha...
Most common topic they talked was about death..OMG...That topic was not suitable for my age!!!hahaha..but from the way the talked,slowly I felt I got drifted by my young age..One of them said "Life is short...we used to be young like you..."he pointed at me..That sentence woke me up from my dream..now I realized how fast time can fly..We are getting older each second...For example I was younger when I started to write this blog compared to now...My grandfather really enjoyed the visit...I could see it from his eyes...Another thing is my grandfather said to his mother "Nowadays I am afraid to ride on motorcycle for a long journey because of my age..Luckily my grand son wanted to take me to see you"...I was like "OoO..actually you are not confident with yourself but you pretend to be other wise"If I did not offer him to take him to his mother,I dare to say he would go there even he is not fit enough"...
After awhile, we said goodbye to them...On the way back home,only God knew how tired I was but I played cool..My grandfather felt to sleep in the car...Leaved me alone driving..huuuu...
That's all for today dear..I want to sleep right now...see u soon dear..love u soo much..taaa
Saturday, September 25, 2010
People around me
Evening my grandchildren...Today let me share with you about myself so you can know me better even if I already dead by the time you read this...
I am a person who is lazy to talk new people..I only talkative when I am with people who are close to me...When it comes to people who I hate or I dislike then I try my best to put some distance between us so that I do not be vocal towards them...Not worth to fight with people...
Several times I am being misunderstood by new people around me..I recall an incident when I was in a class where there was only a few friends from my cohort and the rest was from other courses...So as usual I did not talk and minimized my contact with the new people...Then one day there was a camp where we were divided into several groups...Each group had 5-7 students...And each of the member had to talk about themselves and could post questions to other group members...
Then...you know what happened?I introduced my self and then I slept..hahaha...I didn't hear about others...So when the questioning session came, one of the group members asked me so many questions about my self..@_@...the best question was "why are you so secretive?can't you please share with us your interest and hobby?"....Then I answered "Why should I?Obviously we don't have anything in common"...and that student said "I want to know you more"...and I replied "well,I'm here not to make friends,but I'm here just to finish my study"..wahahaha...
When I'm in a new environment with new friends, I take my own sweet time to be familiar with with them..but sometimes I can be friendly with new people if they have something unique with them...hahahaha..
Until this time,I got to go coz I have other commitment...nite2 dear..taaa
I am a person who is lazy to talk new people..I only talkative when I am with people who are close to me...When it comes to people who I hate or I dislike then I try my best to put some distance between us so that I do not be vocal towards them...Not worth to fight with people...
Several times I am being misunderstood by new people around me..I recall an incident when I was in a class where there was only a few friends from my cohort and the rest was from other courses...So as usual I did not talk and minimized my contact with the new people...Then one day there was a camp where we were divided into several groups...Each group had 5-7 students...And each of the member had to talk about themselves and could post questions to other group members...
Then...you know what happened?I introduced my self and then I slept..hahaha...I didn't hear about others...So when the questioning session came, one of the group members asked me so many questions about my self..@_@...the best question was "why are you so secretive?can't you please share with us your interest and hobby?"....Then I answered "Why should I?Obviously we don't have anything in common"...and that student said "I want to know you more"...and I replied "well,I'm here not to make friends,but I'm here just to finish my study"..wahahaha...
When I'm in a new environment with new friends, I take my own sweet time to be familiar with with them..but sometimes I can be friendly with new people if they have something unique with them...hahahaha..
Until this time,I got to go coz I have other commitment...nite2 dear..taaa
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
My raya
Almost 2 weeks have passed since the 1st Raya day.I did not write anything in my blog even I have so many things to share with you my dear grandchildren. Tonight I want to share my story about Hari Raya...
How to start hu?I would start with the day before Raya...I woke up at 7 p.m after sleeping for almost 8 hours during the day..haha..not a good habit when you sleep during the day mostly in the fasting month..So after I woke up, I rushed in a lightning speed to go back to my village..You know,I had to break my fast in my village because in Sungai Petani there was nothing to eat...Around 7.25 p.m, we could eat already..but I still riding on my bike..so I broke my fast by drinking 100 plus which I bought at a stall on my way back to my village...
Around 7.35 p.m I arrived at my village...Quite funny I did not feel hungry..But to compliment the prophet's teaching,I ate to break my fast.Then after resting a while,around 10.20 p.m I went back to Sungai Petani...I stayed alone in Sungai Petani...Coz I was a heavy gammer...In Sungai Petani, I could dominate the usage of internet and my computer...So I could play without any interruptions...
I played and played and played until 7 a.m the next day..@_@...haha...I played DOTA game...For my second last game which started at 7.35 a.m, players in Garena (a hub to play online games) started to wish Hari Raya to each other..Then one player asked me what time did the Raya prayer would start..Then I realized "wow..today is already Hari Raya??"haha...
Then after the last game,many people loggged out to celebrate Hari Raya...So not so much people wanted to play...I online and surfing awhile then I watched South Park cartoons online...The cartoons were so funny..I laughed so hard until I felt thirsty...You should watch them but you have to be really mature because the cartoons toyed other people norms and believes..
Then I felt sleepy...My head started to be heavier then before....I barely could move my head..hahaha..coz it became so heavy...Around 9 o'clock in the morning I slept...ZZzzz...ZzzZZZ...ZZZzzz..When I was sleeping, my handphone kept on receiving messages from my friends wishing me Selamat Hari Raya..=_=...I tried to reply but the line had problem..Maybe to many people using the line made it stuck..Then I felt slightly annoyed by the messages because I could not reply all of them,I decided to switch off my handphone...I continued my sleeping peacefully..
Out of sudden, I woke up and looked at the clock...OoOO..It was almost 7 p.m in the evening...So I took a journey to my village to celebrate Raya..Then at 10 p.m, I went back to Sungai Petani again to be alone...hahaha...Raya this year was the same with the previous years...Nothing interesting happened...I hate Raya day...I don't even have Baju Melayu because it will be wasted if I have it..I dont wear Baju Melayu for a long time except for praying...
So what did I do during the Raya day? 0_O...ermm..nothing different compare to the normal day...Raya..Raya..Raya..Raya is for people who like to Raya..haha..
Sleepy already...next time I will tell you other story okay...daaa
How to start hu?I would start with the day before Raya...I woke up at 7 p.m after sleeping for almost 8 hours during the day..haha..not a good habit when you sleep during the day mostly in the fasting month..So after I woke up, I rushed in a lightning speed to go back to my village..You know,I had to break my fast in my village because in Sungai Petani there was nothing to eat...Around 7.25 p.m, we could eat already..but I still riding on my bike..so I broke my fast by drinking 100 plus which I bought at a stall on my way back to my village...
Around 7.35 p.m I arrived at my village...Quite funny I did not feel hungry..But to compliment the prophet's teaching,I ate to break my fast.Then after resting a while,around 10.20 p.m I went back to Sungai Petani...I stayed alone in Sungai Petani...Coz I was a heavy gammer...In Sungai Petani, I could dominate the usage of internet and my computer...So I could play without any interruptions...
I played and played and played until 7 a.m the next day..@_@...haha...I played DOTA game...For my second last game which started at 7.35 a.m, players in Garena (a hub to play online games) started to wish Hari Raya to each other..Then one player asked me what time did the Raya prayer would start..Then I realized "wow..today is already Hari Raya??"haha...
Then after the last game,many people loggged out to celebrate Hari Raya...So not so much people wanted to play...I online and surfing awhile then I watched South Park cartoons online...The cartoons were so funny..I laughed so hard until I felt thirsty...You should watch them but you have to be really mature because the cartoons toyed other people norms and believes..
Then I felt sleepy...My head started to be heavier then before....I barely could move my head..hahaha..coz it became so heavy...Around 9 o'clock in the morning I slept...ZZzzz...ZzzZZZ...ZZZzzz..When I was sleeping, my handphone kept on receiving messages from my friends wishing me Selamat Hari Raya..=_=...I tried to reply but the line had problem..Maybe to many people using the line made it stuck..Then I felt slightly annoyed by the messages because I could not reply all of them,I decided to switch off my handphone...I continued my sleeping peacefully..
Out of sudden, I woke up and looked at the clock...OoOO..It was almost 7 p.m in the evening...So I took a journey to my village to celebrate Raya..Then at 10 p.m, I went back to Sungai Petani again to be alone...hahaha...Raya this year was the same with the previous years...Nothing interesting happened...I hate Raya day...I don't even have Baju Melayu because it will be wasted if I have it..I dont wear Baju Melayu for a long time except for praying...
So what did I do during the Raya day? 0_O...ermm..nothing different compare to the normal day...Raya..Raya..Raya..Raya is for people who like to Raya..haha..
Sleepy already...next time I will tell you other story okay...daaa
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Morning...how are you today?today I spent most of my time searching for a song...It is actually an advertisement song I heard during my childhood..When the first time I heard it,I was staying with my grandparents in their house...So I need to listen to the advertisement again because it can take me back into the past time..
Do you want me to describe the advertisement?Okay the advertisement is about Mild 7 outdoor challenge...I only remember the part where there was a man paddling a blue kayak in the sea and the camera showed inside the water,showing a stingray swimming under the kayak... The song that accompanies the advertisement is so soothing and yet it makes me feel some emptiness inside me...=_=...yup...I was so young that time but I could feel something was missing in my life..
You know...I believe that certain things can take you travel through time...Nivea face wash and dashing powder make me remember my foundation year...everytime I smell it,I can feel the year is so vivid to my vision..Jim Brickman piano songs really take me into my childhood years..everytime I listen to them,I can remember my childhood years...So many great songs can make me travel back into time..That's why I listen to oldies songs...haha
Now I'm on a mission to find the advertisement..wish me luck...
Do you want me to describe the advertisement?Okay the advertisement is about Mild 7 outdoor challenge...I only remember the part where there was a man paddling a blue kayak in the sea and the camera showed inside the water,showing a stingray swimming under the kayak... The song that accompanies the advertisement is so soothing and yet it makes me feel some emptiness inside me...=_=...yup...I was so young that time but I could feel something was missing in my life..
You know...I believe that certain things can take you travel through time...Nivea face wash and dashing powder make me remember my foundation year...everytime I smell it,I can feel the year is so vivid to my vision..Jim Brickman piano songs really take me into my childhood years..everytime I listen to them,I can remember my childhood years...So many great songs can make me travel back into time..That's why I listen to oldies songs...haha
Now I'm on a mission to find the advertisement..wish me luck...
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Food and YOU!!!
Good morning!!!It's 3.41 AM 4/9/10 rite now...I wonder what age you will begin to read my blog...I hope when the time comes,you are matured enough to accept things in my blog and the content is still relevant at your time...
Last night I went to cyber cafe with my friends. We went there from 11 AM till 4 AM..haha..We played DOTA..It is an online game...So after we played for so long, we were very hungry...I decided to go to the nearest nasi kandar restaurant which was located soOooo near from the CC...
While we were almost out of the CC...one of my friends bought curry puffs...It is not wrong to buy curry puffs...but...The seller was not a muslim..=_=...I said to my friend, "Woi...are u blind?he is not a muslim..why on earth you bought the curry puffs from him?" He just kept quiet...haishhh...Did I miss something there?Should I slap him on his face because buying food from non muslim? He is 23 years old,so I don't think I should slap him in his face...He can think maturedly I believe..haishhh...
Maybe my friend is a secular..hahaha...He differentiates between food and religion when hungry...The point is you should not buy food from non muslim even when you are hungry like a piranha...It's not halal!!!...The curry puffs were made from meat and chicken..So when non muslim made them, I don't think he would use meat and chicken which were halal...=_=
DONT YOU DARE TO EAT NON HALAL FOOD BECAUSE IT WILL BECOME UR FLESH AND BLOOD...If you eat,you will inherit non halal blood to your generations..then your children,grandchildren and great2 grandchildren will behave like non halal animals..LOL... I'm not being racist here but in term of choosing food, we should be strict..
I am very disappointed with my friend when he bought the curry puffs because there were many more halal food near the CC...more over,all of us are muslim..no one influenced him to buy non halal food...adess...
You know what, one of my good friends is a chinese...we often go out to eat together...but I never eat non halal food..In fact, I lead him to halal restaurant and he likes it very much...
Now I'm too tired to write anymore...good night dear...bye
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