I am looking for a thing that I want for so long. I have waited for a long time yet I still does not get it. I do give my best shot. Haish. Still cannot get it. I also change my plan twice already. You know, I do not want to change it anymore because even I change for the third time, deep inside I know I am still longing to have the first thing that I want. Crazy isn't it? Some people can just go on without thinking things that they have changed but not me. I will keep trying and thinking why I fail and what can I do to have it. It makes me feel a bit failure if I do not have things that I want. I have given my best effort to get it yet still fail.Arghh. Now I do not know whether I should spend my money on something else or need to wait until a person shows up with thing that I want. How long should I wait? I do not want to use illegal way to get it. That is not cool. I want a fair game. So I will feel I really deserve it.
You know what hurts the most? When I am waiting for so long and then out of nowhere got people who do not wait at all get it. =_=. It hurts but hey, that is life. Putting effort only increases the chance, not a guaranty you will get it. Anyway, I take my failure as an experience. Maybe it is not meant for me for good reasons.
Sleepy already.Good night.
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